Church has always featured somewhere in my life, and beginning to help at a local Girls’ Brigade company sparked something more in me. I enjoyed the fellowship and loved leading girls and sharing in their quest to ‘Seek, Serve and Follow Christ.’ Soon after, I found myself in Church each Sunday, becoming involved in leading Sunday School and immersing myself in the life of the Church and the Girls’ Brigade. However, my childhood dream was primary school teaching, and at that time, Church and Girls’ Brigade were a hobby, something I did to wind down.
Despite all my best efforts in teaching, it never felt quite right. There was something missing. Early in my teaching career, I felt a fleeting nudge toward ministry. Like Moses, no sooner had it entered my thoughts than I had countered it with thoughts of, ‘who me?’ ‘I am too young,’ and ‘no one would want to listen to me on a Sunday morning!’
So, the teaching continued, but I felt increasingly anxious and restless most of the time. I remember the Minister of my home church coming to visit one evening, and as he left, he looked me in the eye and said, ‘Elaine, you will never be at peace with yourself until you follow God’s Call.’
I had my head in the sand for a very long time, ignoring God’s call. Until 2017, when I thought all my prayers had been answered as I entered a role in Airdre as a Ministry Development member of staff. I discovered that I came alive when I was working alongside people, journeying with them and sharing God’s love in action. I remember one morning, driving to work and feeling overwhelmed with emotion. I looked around for the first time in many years and could appreciate God’s beauty. I was beginning to feel that sense of peace I had lacked for so long.
In 2020, I started up a conversation with the training team at 121. Entering discernment with a Diaconal focus felt right. The role of Deacon formed the crux of many conversations over these years. The final straw was when the Deacon from my early Girls’ Brigade days, Glenda McLaren, appeared on Facebook after not seeing her for over 20 years. After a conversation with Glenda and many hours of prayer and discussion with family and friends, I followed the path into the Diaconate.
God willing, I will be ordained as a Minister of Word and Service by the end of this year. How has this journey changed me? As I led worship in my home congregation at the beginning of training, a member said to me, ‘I don’t know what it is about you Elaine, but something has changed, you seem more at peace.’ This is the most significant change. I have found inner peace that only God can provide. I have nurtured and developed my relationship with God and appreciate the value of relationships in ministry. Why this and not the Ministry of Word and Sacrament. I have to say, for me, it is the call to love and serve as Jesus did. To listen, value, and come alongside people where they are motivates me in my ministry. I have always felt moved by the words, ‘Here I am, Lord,’ I felt personally called through these words and still do.
Here I am, Lord, to love and serve as you first loved and served us.
By Elaine Wood