In December, Chris Blackshaw reminded us of the importance of fallow time, the time when it looks like nothing is happening. In reality, the earth is resting and restoring itself for future growth when investments are made that will lead to long-term well-being and fruitful harvests.
It also reminded the support team of what can happen when we don’t make long-term investments and the small steps we might take to make them possible.
Bob’s story:
Bob was delighted with his house. With an amazing view of the sea and everything fresh and new, he felt he could sit back, relax and not worry about the future as long as he looked after it.
Life was busy, though, with work and helping others with their needs. Bob found increasingly few opportunities to take care of his property. He knew it wasn’t great, but it would be OK; after all, it was new.
And indeed, it wasn’t until the storm came, perhaps like the ones increasingly affecting all of us, and there was significant damage to Bob’s property. Not only had he lost his roof, but his lovely sandy foundations had washed away, and his house was damaged beyond repair.
It won’t have missed your notice this story sounds familiar. In Matthew’s Gospel (7:27), Jesus reminds listeners that we must establish strong faith foundations to navigate the storms of life. Many of us will have experienced a sense of our personal and emotional foundations, feeling shaken by the storms of life, and at this time of closures of buildings and endings for some congregations, it can feel like storms of all kinds buffet us from every side.
How might we then, as individuals and communities, ensure our foundations are strong, spiritually, emotionally and physically, to face the challenges ahead, enabling us to be open and ready for the possibilities and signs of new life that will emerge?
One way we might do this is through self-care. Although the phrase “holistic care of ourselves” may feel overused, it is an essential part of ensuring strong foundations that enable us to be open emotionally and intellectually to ourselves and others.
In pastoral support, we see three core areas as key.
Obvious as it might sound, if we don’t care for ourselves physically, everything else falls apart. Nevertheless, we all understand the challenges of time and demands that make prioritising ourselves physically difficult. A session meeting here and a community café there, alongside family and other needs, make it hard to prioritise ourselves, yet without care for the body, we won’t be in a position to support anyone else.
Long-term investment begins with small actions, from finding physical activity and diet changes that we enjoy and energise to noticing the actions that drain life from us. That might include establishing a sleeping practice that involves disconnecting from devices and workbooks before bed, taking time to notice the pressure points that cause us physical and mental stress, and finding ways to counterbalance them.
This leads to the second part. How might we care for our minds, including nurturing and nourishing ourselves by doing something we enjoy? For each of us, this will be different, from further intellectual study and debate to creative arts, music, or just time with good friends.
This may sound counterintuitive, especially with so much to do and few people and others in different places and situations are having such a difficult time, but when we take time to relax and take pleasure in activities we enjoy, we reconnect with our creative selves and find moments of joy that connect us with others and with God.
It can also introduce and connect us with others who aren’t connected to the Church and faith but bring something new and interesting to our lives. Sometimes, it challenges and stimulates us, but again, it nourishes us as we go forward and opens us to new ideas and ways of being. It might also nurture relationships where we feel supported and cared for when we are often the people doing the supporting.
Finally, but central to it all, is the care of the spirit, developing and nurturing a spiritual practice that restores and refreshes us to return to our ministry and action in the world.
As people of faith, we recognise the value of a spiritual practice in our relationship with God, but it also has a positive effect on our relationship with others and with ourselves
Taking time out to pray, meditate or read spiritual writing or poetry reduces stress hormones, calms the mind and emotions and can help us step back and get a different perspective on a situation/ life in general and away from the fight/ flight thinking that becomes so habitual when life feels difficult and stressful.
Just as the opening anecdote reflected the Gospel challenge to set our foundations in Christ (Matt 7: 26-27), what spiritual practice do we have, or are we drawn to, that enables us to feel more rooted in God and each other?
Our spiritual practice will be unique to each of us and may change over time, but whatever it is, we should commit to it and invest in it for our relationships with God, others, and ourselves.
Making long-term investments in ourselves in a time of closures and endings can be difficult, yet it is ultimately worth it, opening ourselves up to nurturing and nourishing relationships and building solid foundations that are essential when change and challenge seem all around.
If making these changes alone feels challenging or you would like some ideas to develop your practice, have a look at the Ascend website or get in touch with the pastoral support team at pastoralsupport@churchofscotland.org.uk We would be very happy to help.
By Miriam McHardy
Clinical Support Officer